August 31, 2008

Today I woke up. I really wish I hadn't I was just hopeing everything that happened yesterday was all just one big dream. I lost my girlfriend today not to tore up about it because I knew it was coming anyways she's just so predictable I guess. I just want someone whos a challenge. Someone who won't go behind my back and talk to other guys. Someone who loves me for me. And someone who won't fight over stupid shit. But my heart lies in North Carolina with Ashley she's that girl I haven't seen her in so long and I miss her so much. She promised me she would come back for me one day and start a family with me :( I miss her.

Everyday

Everyday I try a little bit harder than the day before. I try to be the perfect boyfirend. I try to be the perfect bestfriend. I try to be the perfect son and big brother, But here latley I sit and wonder if i should just give up. My girlfriend doesn't act like a girlfriend and im sick and fucking tired of it she talks to other guys and she just doesn't act like she really gives a shit. I've lost most of my so called bestfriends I only have 2 I can trust and depend on. I fight with my parents and siblings everyday and it's just fucking pathetic. I think I will just move far away and start a new life i know it's selfish of me to say or do, but it's the only way i'll ever be truely happy, but I know it will happen again and again no matter how far i run away.